i thought i was going to be fine on the last day of school.alot of my classmates cried and i didnt.
i thought i was going to walk out of the school like nothing happened.
in the end,somehow when almost everyone left
i cried.
my tears just fell uncontrollably.
i tried to restrain myself from crying but i just couldn't.
gladys was with me the whole way through.
we sat at the concourse at first.
but it started to rain heavily.
then it reminds me of the last time it actually rained that big.
coincidence huh?
i cried so much that my eyes were swollen.
it never seemed to stop.
...
stayed in school til 1.30pm when i decided to go off
waited for christy at bugis.
during the waiting time,my tears fell again.
my head hurts,my eyes hurts
n i had no appetite to eat anything even though i was hungry
i don't know y i was crying so much.
nothing is going through my head
all i noe is that im tired of being strong and wants a break down.
christy forced me to eat something
cos she scared i'll faint.
we sat down at some random place
n i started asking her about things which i've been confused about.
i asked her y i was crying so hard.
she told me that there's too much reasons.
i asked her y i felt so hurt even though im letting go
she told me bcos we human r selfish.
maybe...?
i shouldn't be crying.
i always think that when u really cares for someone,all u will ever want is for that person to be happy,because when they are,u'll be.
i went home and fell asleep.
woke up after 1 hour.
usually i'll feel better after i sleep.
but this time is different.
i started crying the moment i woke up.
i noe it's bad to have thoughts like that.
but at that point of time,i really really felt like dying.
i hope i can just faint and lost all my memories.
i didn't really eat for the whole entire day.
and i went to jingzhi's hse for a sleepover at night cos i quarreled with my mum.
came home today.
she started screaming at me and blaming me for everything when i just stepped into the house.
again.
in the end my parents agreed to have a divorce.
it's not just because of the quarrel that lead to it
ever since i was 4,my parents has been quarreling over me
my mum wanted to be harsh with me,my dad wanted to protect me
in the end they quarrel,they fight.
my dad always leave the house for a few days before coming back.
no matter how much i wanted to follow him
i couldn't.
my dad once told me that he doesn't want to lose my mum,neither does he want to lose me.
i felt so guilty.
i keep apologising to him bcos other than that i dont know wat else to do.
it's all my fault.
if i never exist,i wouldn't have brought all these problems to people around me.
i felt hopeless now.
i really don't know how to continue with my life anymore.
i can't stand it any further.
it's my fault.
everything is my fault.
i can't do anything to stop it.
im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry,im sorry.
i noe there's no use saying sorry..
but.
mummy,daddy,
im sorry...
my blog is dead again -.-ahh.nvms.my results suck....
Triple Sci+ss+egeog
Mr Lim teach slower
Saturday, October 31, 2009
@ 11:47 PM 
